What is the world coming to these days! Is there no end to the insanity of it? Actually there soon will be whether you like it or not. New rules proposed by the European Union, endorsed by the United Nations and backed by a conspiracy of multi-national corporations, trade unions and assorted radical loonies, would require anybody wishing to go mad to apply to Brussels in triplicate three months in advance, with a doctor's certificate showing suitable grounds for intended insanity, likely duration of madness and economic impact of requested episode. Permission is unlikely to be granted for most decent law-abiding Brits!
And even if it is, you'll have to pay for the privilege! A so called Insanity Compensatrory Premium or Mad Tax will be levied to cover the cost of any anticpated treamtent (chalk placebo pills, padded wall hangings and/or strait jacket,) damage to walls (from head butting) and carpet (from chewing) in official buildings, hospitals etc.
Whatever happened to a citizen's inalienable right to be stark, staring bonkers, when and wherever it suited them? Surely this was what the British Empire was built on - generations of mentally unbalanced, socially inadequate public school boys of the officer class and their demented underlings deluding themselves that they knew better than anybody else how to run the world. Why change all that?
Time was when even infants were free to "throw their toys out of the pram", shoppers could go "off their trolley" and even vegetarians could be "nuts" without asking anyone's permission. Under these proposals not even driving instrructors can be "driven crazy" any more-- unless they've got permission from a faceless, overpaid, pcpusher with a gold-plated pension who probably reserves himself the right to to go howling at the moon in his thickly-carpeted, wood panelled, public-paid office whenever he feels like it! Is that fair?!! No!!!
In this age of unbridled bureaucratic meddling our good old-fashioned traditonal approach to madness is under serious threat. No longer will we be allowed to just shuffle over to another seat on the bus or smile weakly and make our excuses while agreeing that the Daily Mail has got it right. It never bothered us before that half the country was doolally, why should it now? I'll tell you why. Because those evil, lying, parasitic, good for nothing Eurocrats are on an international job-creation scheme for themselves and their cronies, "measuring" everything, developing "policies", drawing up "regulations" that are, in fact, no more than a huge scam to take money from our pockets to put into their vast salaries and even vaster pension pots, and that's not even mentioning their even vaster expenses!
We've uncovered some of the details of their evil scheme. In order to minimise costs targets will be set and quotas applied to the number of people allowed to go mad at any one time. Once the loony bins are full, earlier occupants will be forced out, off benefits and made to work for Con-Dem think tanks, since it's proved difficult to get sane people involved in this growth area for long. Unauthorised madness will be ignored and victims will be expected to carry on working as before. There has been some concern raised about possible issues in relation to air-traffic control, trident submarines, nuclear power stations and the like but these have been swept under the carpet..along with what little COMMON SENSE these Eurodrones can muster.
Well it's not good enough! The fightback starts here!! This is a rallying call!!! We urge all good, honest decent, somewhat-batty-and-occasionally-barking Britons to oppose this going mad gone mad!!!! Stand up straight, put your finger in your ear and shout out loudly and proudly":
"I'M MAD AS HELL AND I'M NOT GOING TO PAY FOR IT...OR FILL IN ANY FORMS, SO THERE. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment